Care to give an opinion on this?
I’m an undergraduate who will be graduating from my university in 6 months.
There is a professor at my campus who is younger and single who seems a little
bit interested in me. Perhaps not, but I have seen check me out a few times so
I believe he is atleast somewhat attracted to me. I have talked to him a few
times and he seems like someone i would like to get to know more. I have never
had him as a professor nor will I in the next 6 months. However, he is a
professor in the same department that I am majoring in.
By policy, would it be unethical for us to go on a date AFTER I graduate 6
months from now? I know the official rule is you must wait 2 years after having
someone as a professor to have any romantic relations with them. But seeing as
he never was my prof, I’m wondering is this would be okay. I wouldn’t want him
to get into trouble or anything like that. What do you think?
confession n. A written or oral statement acknowledging guilt, made by one who has been accused or charged with an offense.
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It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.
— Oscar Wilde
It's kind of like being in someone's head while they're praying or thinking about things they'd never say outloud.
— Yaflapkik
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October 17th, 2009 at 5:42 pm
I think it’s ok after you graduate.. I would possibly ask the head of the department (send an anonymous email or something), or possibly ask another prof if they know what the policy is.
I don’t know about any 2 year rule… when I went to my Teaching Assistant orientation, they told us if we wanted to date one of our students, we just had to wait until the class was over. I would expect that most schools would say the same. I would just wait until you graduate to be in the clear, then go ahead and ask them out for a friendly drink/coffee. I don’t see the school having a problem with it at all if you are no longer a student there.. Just keep in mind though, that the professor might not feel comfortable with dating a former student, whether he’ll get into trouble or not.
October 18th, 2009 at 8:53 am
At my university, I was able to search around and find the policies for this on the website (in the faculty manual), so you might check into that. Also, at my U, the policy is that a prof/student relationship is fine as long as the professor has no power over the student and will never, again. I.e. you can’t date a professor you know will you will have again, is writing letters of recommendation for you, etc.
Personally, I think you are in the clear right now, but it would probably be better for all involved to wait until after your graduation. In the meantime, get to know him a little better :) Good luck!
October 20th, 2009 at 6:37 pm
I think you’re fine now if you’ve never even had him as a teacher. Like #3 said, try to find more details about the policy. Usually it’s forbidden if they are in a position of authority. But if you’ve never had him and especially after you graduate, I’m sure it’s fine.
October 21st, 2009 at 5:03 pm
Actually #1 and #5 are the same (from me). So I just proved you wrong, douchebag.
October 22nd, 2009 at 11:54 am
HEY #7, have a conscience and STOP lying to all these people with your FAKE posts, will ya? Stop being a P*ICK! Isn’t it enough you’ve duped enough people already? I know there’s ONE (idiot) born every minute, but have a heart. STOP lying to these people!
October 27th, 2009 at 7:32 am
I’m #3, but not 5 or OP. What evidence are you basing this on? The voices in your head?
October 29th, 2009 at 4:01 pm
#9, can it be possible that this guy you’ve been calling a douche bag, been monitoring your computer and knows you? and knows what sites you’re on? he’s probably laughing u off right now He can’t be banished cause this site’s been checking you out too
October 30th, 2009 at 7:26 pm
Don’t you have better things to do than monitor a site that about 5 people use?
Wouldn’t it be more productive to go monitor MySpace or something if you’re so computer savvy??
It’s just a confession site it’s not like people are entering credit card info here or
something. Sounds like you have a pretty boring life.
October 31st, 2009 at 12:02 am
who ur talking to 11? huh?
October 31st, 2009 at 12:33 am
HEY 11, OP, 1, 3, 5, 7 (ALL the same OLD douche bag, also known as professor, Incrushdenial, etc.). . . You’re the one who’s been posting FAKE posts to whoever is stupid enough to believe you for sooo long. You “appointed” yourself to this site and you’re also on other sites FAKING your way through them. STOP being a PRICK, lying to these people and GET A LIFE, not to mention a conscience, while you’re at it! STOP LYING
October 31st, 2009 at 12:36 am
OLD DOUCHEBAG is also #9 YUP, Mr.loser has been the one posting fake posts that some of you thought were legit “stories”, and his “fantasies” on this site ** L-O-S-E-R **
November 3rd, 2009 at 4:28 am
Sorry about the troller everyone. Another one for the Book of the Banned
November 7th, 2009 at 7:39 pm
Hey #12, *LOSER*, ‘Professor’, anonymous… who u calling ‘troll of the banned’? You’re the one with the FAKE posts! Yup, people. . . the OLD douchebag who ain’t got a job and doesn’t know that the internet can be accessed anywhere 24/7. STOP lying to all stupid people w/ your so-called advice and keep your fantasies on porn sites, loser!
December 14th, 2009 at 11:22 pm
damn……& now he IS going to be my prof for next semester after all (had to pick up a course that only he teaches for my degree). I think he’d get in trouble even if we only got involved after I graduated, unless it was kept on the down-low. Oh well……as least next semester I’ll have one class to look forward to. I know we’d be good together, and in a different context it would work. I guess after I graduate I have nothing to lose anyway. It couldn’t hurt to pass on my number to him & hint to him to give me a call could it?
December 15th, 2009 at 12:23 am
I would just wait until a little time has passed after you graduate. Keep in touch and see how he acts. I don’t see what the problem would be if you graduate and you are sure you won’t go back for a Masters or something.